On March 5, 2011 we said goodbye to a wonderful mother, friend, mentor and a gracious lady. Joan Pavey was born on July 17, 1919. Mother to four sons, grandmother to five grandsons and one granddaughter, as well as six great-grandchildren.
Joan's passion was her beloved dogs, being an accomplished breeder of Collies and Shelties. Through this endeavour she made friends across the continent and was an excellent mentor to many new to the dog fancy.
This site was set up by her daughter-in-law Jo Ann, so that everyone who knew Joan could share in the celebration of a life well lived.
If you so desire, please leave any memories, thoughts or expressions of condolence by clicking on "Comments" just below in light blue and leaving your comments and memories for all to share. Anyone can comment, you don't need a google account, just click on "name/url" and fill in your name, or anoymous and add your name to the end of your note.
To view all of the comments already left here, just click on the light blue "Comments" just below.
31 comments:
Although I never met Joan personally, I have met her son Terry and his wife Jo Ann is a dear friend. May those of us
with 'Whitegates' Shelties in our pedigree's continue to make Joan proud. Her legacy will live on. Thank you Joan, and Heaven has received another star.
My condolences to the family and friends.
Sincere condolences to the Pavey family on Joan's passing. The Sheltie world has lost one of the great ones, whose passion for the breed and wealth of knowledge contributed so much to the Sheltie world.
Carol Williams
Devon, AB
What a lovely tribute to a well known Sheltie influence. We send our deepest sympathies to the Pavey family on the death of Joan.
Pat Ljungh,
Patti Graham,
Kingston, ON
Jo Ann and Terry our sincerest of condolences. When I learned of her
passing on Sat I shared this sad news with fellow exhibitors at ring side.
We all shared our wonderful memories of her with each other with tears in
our eyes. She had such an impact on us all, whether it was teaching
someone how to groom, supporting us through a bad time or just being there
when we needed her. She had an incredible sense of sportsmanship, she was an
amazing person and we are all so privileged to have had known her. She
touched so many of us . Her unbelievable courage and love for the breeds
shone through you on Saturday.
She will be dearly missed.
Sincerely
Nancy & Bill
Sincere condolences to the Pavey family on the passing of Joan. Although I do not remember ever meeting her I have heard alot about her over the years and her influence on our beloved breed. A star shines bright and I am sure she had a lot of shelties greet her at the bridge when she arrived. I am sure she will be greatly missed.
Joan was one of the first people I met when I began to go to dog shows with her great friend Audrey Benbow. I have so many memories of things she taught me and of her elegance and charm. When I wanted to add a Sheltie to my house, I called Joan and she referred me to Jo Ann and Calabar Grand Slam (Cody) became a beloved addition to my brood. I have had a Sheltie with Whitegates in its pedigree ever since. I remember one particular trip to the Garden in the 60s with Audrey and Joan. We bathed and dried borzoi and left them in the room while we went for dinner. We had bought special coverlets for the beds - a lovely leopard print. When we returned we had a slightly damp leopard spotted borzoi to greet us. We spent a few hours in the hotel bathroom with diluted javex and a lot of laughs. It was interesting to see a Ridgeside sheltie among the pictures. Fred Edlin of Ridgeside moved to borzoi and just passed away a couple of months ago. I'm sure they are sharing many memories. Too many of the special people in our sport have left us this past year. Condolences to the family on the passing of a great lady. She will be missed by her family and by the fancy.
Our sinere condolences to the Pavey family on the passing of Joan. I met Joan quite by accident at the 1988 ASSA Specialty. I did not know exactly who she was or her importance to the Sheltie world then, being that I was a newbie to the breed. We happened to have sat next to each other and had a nice long chat about Shelties just in general. She was very gracious to me and answered all kinds of questions that I had. I began to see the Shelties through her eyes and absolute love of them. It was one of those incredible moments in my life that I will never forget.
Your tribute to your mom is exquitely beautiful and touches the heart in many places. She will be missed by many.
Sincerely,
Flo Martin
I was deeply saddened on Saturday to learn of the passing of a dear lady. My first Sheltie came from Joan Pavey back in 1976. She became Ch. Whitegates Tinker Belle, a Ch. Calcurt Luke daughter. Joan was living in Uxbridge at the time and was making a trip to deliver Tinker's sister. We met at Audrey Gray's in St. Lazare to pick Tinker up. From then on, Joan became a friend and mentor to me. Over the years I've had and bred to a number of Whitegates shelties though sadly there is only one remaining in my family now. Looking at the pictures posted, the one of Joan with "Porky" at DC&SSA was the first specialty show I went to. Interesting how our paths take us somehow: my cousin, Penny Murton (Windancer Collies) grew up next door to Joan and her family in Chambly, Quebec. Then I got Tinker from Joan. Jo Ann and I both grew up not far from each other in Pointe Claire though attended different schools and got to know each other through our Shelties at Hazel Slaughter's training classes. And then Jo Ann married Terry. It's such a small world. My deepest condolences to Joan's family on her passing. Rest in peace Joan. God bless.
Jane
FairIsle Shetland Sheepdogs
Randolph, VT
Our sincere condolences to Terry and JoAnn and all the Pavey family.
Joan will be fondly remembered by the dog fancy and Sheltie folk in particular.
Ann & Harry Mitchell
Harriann Shelties
I first met Joan at a dog show in Montreal, when I was a teenager.Jo Ann and I went home that night and excitedly told our parents about the beautiful Sheltie puppy we saw (Whitegates Hey Look Me Over)and how nice this woman of Whitegates Shelties had been to us. Years later in Toronto, Joan became a close friend. Being with Joan,and especially traveling with Joan, was always fun. She had a great sense of humour and loved to laugh. She was a person you wanted to be around. I can picture her standing by a grooming table or sitting at ringside, with her many friends coming by to chat. Twenty years ago, Joan became family when Jo Ann and Terry married. When my first son was born, Joan (never a "baby person") visited and brought a beautiful blanket she had knit. I was so touched by her thoughtfulness and by the work she had put in to making it. My sons thought of her like a grandmother, having shared over a decade of Christmases together,and were happy to celebrate her 90th birthday with her. Joan had a light hearted approach to life. She was an elegant woman who remained positive despite obstacles she encountered along the way, most notably over the past 10 years. Although she never complained about the difficulties she may have faced, she was quick to be concerned about the troubles of others and to give her support and welcome advice. Joan,today Jo Ann and I were supposed to be visiting you, but it was not meant to be. Instead, I am picturing you at the bridge, surrounded by the many bright eyes and wagging tails of the Whitegates Collies and Shelties you adored. Terry and Jo Ann,although you take ocmfort in knowing Joan led a full life, we know how hard it is to lose her, and we send you our hugs and condolences. Our sympathies to all the Pavey sons and families.
Sandra and Paul Welsman,
James and Andrew
Altho I never met Joan formally, her dream of breeding great shelties changed the whole course of my life. A dog she bred was the mother of my first sheltie, the fur-angel who changed everything I ever was and ever will be. He also introduced me to four special human friends I will cherish always. I have had 6 shelties, 5 of them descendants of Joan's dogs - Cody, my angel; Lyric, who made me laugh when I thought I'd never laugh again; Riggsy, my brilliant, bouncy obedience star; Dani, guardian of every breath I took and every step I made; and Doo, the funny little imp keeping me in line today. Those dogs and the humans I met because of them have filled my life with joy and hope and riches beyond imagining. Funny, isn't it, how one special lady could change the whole life of someone she never knew existed. Thank you, Joan. I owe you more than I could ever say. What a greeting there must have been at that Rainbow Bridge as all your fur-kids rushed to welcome you Home.
So sorry for your families loss. Truly a wonderful lady and great mentor to me! Always enjoyed her visits to my home to see puppies. Going up to Niagara on the Lake to have Lunch with her was really a treat, we would have so much fun, laughing and talking dogs. The blog and all the wonderful photos was a great idea, so enjoyed her smile! And, of course all the Whitegate's Sheties~!
Dear Terry and Jo Ann,
I am so sorry for your loss. I didn't know Joan very well, but remember that she was always a hoot to be around. She lived a long life, and I'm sure the fact that she had you so close in her life, especially in these last years, was a great comfort to her. Thanks for the great photo tribute; the photos are wonderful - she was a beautiful woman! Cheers to Joan!
Words cannot describe the saddness I feel at loosing my mentor and good friend. From the first time I met Joan when I purchased Tex, Am/Can Ch. Whitesgates Lets Go Blue, we became great friends and traveling buddies. She was both influencial and inspirational to me. She taught me what "corners" were on a sheltie head! How we looked forward to the dinners at my house and hers and the doggie conversations! When she moved to the Carolinas, we talked everyday on my toll free line at work. I would pick her brain about everything she knew about shelties and she was eager to teach me. The time she gave Tex a head trim only to have picked up straight scissors to her dismay! Oh well, it will grow back I told her and we laughed till we cried! I hope she saves a seat for me someday at that dog show over the rainbow.
Dear Mamie
Unfortunately we didnt spend enough time together - my life, work and family have taken me to the distant corners of the world. I especially regret that our two children, your great grandchildren never got to meet you. I told them on Friday night how wonderful and caring you always were, I told them of your patience, of your love and zest for life, of your generosity and kindness and your eternal positive spirit.
Please look down from the heavens on us, watch your great grandchildren - all six of them now - grow up.
You will always be in our hearts
George
I thought it best to let a few days pass before contributing my thoughts to Joan’s blog.
From Childhood, Joan was always a large presence in the O’Connell’s lives. Tall, elegant, beautiful and fun. Interested in us individually and someone who talked to us as people and not at us as children.
News of a visit always brought anticipation and a feeling of happiness. She had an aura about her, not the least for the fact that she loved and raised dogs. There was something magical in that fact, especially in the eyes of a child.
Growing up and being adult never changed that feeling of anticipation and happiness in spending time together. We always had fun. It started in young adulthood, seeing her like a surrogate Mom and then the relationship evolved into more like that of an older sister and then, older yet, into a true and mature friendship. And the love we felt for each other was always there, sure and profound.
The years after the stroke were heartbreaking for us all. But her strong sense of independence never left her. Self pity was not a part of her character. What an example she was and what an example she has left us with.
I’ll choose not to remember the last years. And, knowing her, she wouldn’t want us to. I’ll remember the fun, the cigarettes, the drinks, the laughter and the sharing of the precious time spent together, discussing anything and everything; and always the fun…the fun.
It’ll be good to get over this time and to start remembering past times, because there are so many good times to remember.
Goodbye, Dear Aunt Joan.
Love,
Michael
My sincere condolences to the Pavey Family.
What a wonderful tribute. Wish we had some pictures of the SSCWNY picnics and pool parties at Bob & Gayle Carpenter's. We always had
such great times and learned so much about the Breed.
Susie Miller Idle Hour Shelties
Although I have never met Joan, I do know Terry and his wife, JoAnne. My very first sheltie was bred to Ch Whitegate's Let's Go Blue so I had the Whitegate line behind my first litter here at Imperial. I remember being able to spot a Whitegate's dog in the ring. Joan was a great influence to our breed.
Please accept our sympathies on your loss.
I needed a couple of days to digest the sad news of Joan's passing before posting this...my sincere condolences to all of the Pavey clan, and those whose hearts Joan touched.
Your tribute is wonderful and touching Jo Ann, and the photos are fabulous. I am sure that Joan is smiling (and blushing!) from up above.
It is always hard to say goodbye to someone you love, especially someone so very special.
Joan Pavey lived her life to the fullest, and freely shared her life lessons with any that were interested.
I was a fledgling dog fancier, who was taken under Joan's wing in the early 80's, and I would never have accomplished what I have to this date without Joan's sage advice and guidance.
I will never forget my first ASSA Sheltie "National" in 1983?? just outside of Boston in Danvers, Mass.
That year, Whitegates Anything U Can Do ("Thumper") went Best In Futurity. Joan was the talk of the town; that night in the host hotel bar there was a great celebration and Joan and Gulie Krook introduced me to "Manhattans On The Rocks", my favourite libation to this day.
In the early years, I had the privilege of showing a great number of Joan's lovely Whitegates Shelties; all the while learning the craft from her.
She was a true "good sport"; something that is sadly lacking in dogs in this day and age. She was also a true and gracious lady. One of a kind...
91 years old...although it is hard to say adios, she lived a long, long life that was full and satisfying, enriched by the many friends that gravitated to her kind and generous spirit.
It was her great fortune to have Jo Ann as a fantastic daughter-in-law, who spent countless hours keeping her company, visiting her faithfully at Bendale Acres in her later years, giving her manicures, and keeping her up to date on all the latest "doggie news".
I'm not an overly religious person myself, but I know in my heart that Joan has her own special place in heaven. And what is "Heaven"???
Heaven is a place where your mother is a little girl again; and her dog can talk!
I know Joan, that right now you have Polly, Mahagony and Vanity at your feet, and are no doubt catching up with Gulie over a Manhattan! Cheers!
I will miss you...
Debbie (Watson) Vandyk
Fairfax Shelties
Hi Mom - The last 24 hours have been miserable Mom. Since your passing, I haven’t had much time to think because I’ve been so busy organizing things. With yesterday’s Memorial Service over, the pain of your passing has now hit me like a ton of bricks and is unbearable at times. All the more so today - after all, it’s Thursday, the day I normally have visited you over the past several years. I feel oh so lost not being able to visit you. I particularly loved visiting on really cold days because I got to feel your warm hands rubbing my frigid fingers just like you did when I was a little boy. God this is so hard not being able to feel your hands squeeze mine or for me to reciprocate by giving you your neck massages – oh just to touch you once more time! I miss you sooooo much Mom. Say hi to Dad - -I know you’re oh so happy now that you’re back in his arms. I love you.
PS – to all your wonderful friends who have taken the time to write such amazing testimonials to Mom on this site, thank you - your words are some comforting to me.
To the Pavey Family,
What a lovely tribute you have created to celebrate Joan's life.
I had the pleasure of knowing Joan since whe was admitted to Bendale Acres in October 2001. That was the same month that I started working here so Joan was one of the first residents I got to know well and so she will always have a special place in my heart.
Joan was a great addition to the Home. She was a true lady, always polite and friendly with a great sense of humour, and always beautifully dressed. She was very active in the Home, attending all the activities and events. She also served as Residents' Council President for several years. She had many friends on the floor and always looked forward to the regular visits from her very supportive family.
Most people will likely remember Joan sitting in her chair stroking the wonderfully realistic-looking stuffed Collie dog who was always by her side. Many people were fooled and thought the dog was real. That is the image I will think of when I remember Joan-and it seems fitting after reading all the tributes from so many friends and colleagues from the Sheltie and Collie community.
She is missed.
With deepest sympathy to Terry & Jo Ann and all the Pavey Family.
I don't remember the date that I first met Joan & Terry Pavey,but I was honored to have spent time with them. Being entrusted with a Whitegate's sheltie, Whitegate's Vanity Fair, (a Hoggie daughter) was a gift we could never repay. I remember taking her home and trying to persuade my husband Paul that we should keep her, this was not an easy task. With much guidance and encouragement from Joan and Terry, Vanity's first litter with us produced four champions. Joan, Terry & Jo Ann were always there to encourage and lend a hand, nothing was ever too much trouble. Joan was a "lady" she will be greatly missed by all who had the privilege of knowing her.
Paul & Gillian Brutzki
Silverdrift
And now it’s my turn Joan.
Everyone who comes here can see how much of an impact you had on people in the dog world. Even though you haven’t been active in that world for about 20 years, you are still thought of as an important influence by many people, a person they have never forgotten.
Why is that? Because quite uniquely in that world, you were a true mentor and friend, unequalled as a mentor by anyone else that I can think of, actually. Some people had more Champions, were more well known or won more – but I can’t honestly think of anyone who helped as many people and set them on the road to their own successes as you did.
It was always about what was best for the breed. Personal records and wins were very much secondary for you. The dog world has changed a lot since the time when we were all so actively involved. I’m so glad you were there for me.
The funny stories that we talked about for years – like the confused neighbour who one morning opened your back gate and let ALL the dogs out into the street, including your beautiful and beloved “Friendly”. You and Terry raced out to round them up, Terry in the van in one direction, you on foot in another. Then Terry comes around a corner in time to see his mother walking down the suburban street in her bathrobe yelling “Friendly! Friendly! Friendly!” at the top of her lungs! Terry telling you to jump in the van before someone took you up on your offer!!
The travel stories where you used your charm to its fullest – like when we were going to the Orlando National and had 6 dogs lined up for Customs inspection, and 4 people travelling. I was annoyed with you because Friendly’s rabies paperwork was out of date and I thought it might put the whole trip in jeopardy. You told me not to worry and then charmed and chatted with the Customs official –he didn't even notice the date on the certificate.
The time in Bendale you weren’t feeling well – I came to take you over to the hospital. You were feeling badly enough that you'd accepted help from the staff in getting dressed. As we settled into the waiting room, you said “This is just awful!”
I said “What’s awful, are you in a lot of pain?”
You said “No, THIS is awful!”
And held up your legs so I could see the completely mismatched slacks, socks and shoes. We laughed so long everyone there must have thought we were a pair of lunatics (not the first time!). Yes, you really weren't feeling well as you would NEVER have mixed up your colours like that yourself! Always one of the best dressed people I knew.
continued below
continued from above
One of my most memorable times with you was when you visited us shortly after we had moved into this house, after the stroke, and I was in the process of painting the living/dining area. You told me to go ahead, we would just talk as I painted. I was worried it was going to be like “watching paint dry” for you – but talk we did and you told me so many things about yourself. I got to know you better than ever before.
You told me about your childhood, parents and siblings. What it was like to be a “handful”, independent and female back in those days (1920’s, 30’s & 40's). Being a debutante and going to the Debutante Balls and meeting your beloved future husband Walt. You told me about him and about expecting your first child and your husband leaving for the war – neither of you knowing when or if he would be back. Having the baby by yourself and waiting for 3 1/2 years until Walter could see his son for the first time. The awful devastation of losing Walt suddenly when he was just 51 years old, changing your world and life in an instant. What it was like for you to try and make a new life afterwards, for the 40 years that you survived him.
Funny which simple moments can turn out to be the memorable ones in one’s life.
Now you are teaching me about grief. While your death when it came wasn’t at all tragic but more of a blessing and I know you were ready – it still brings on the flood of memories and sinks home the fact that you are gone from us for good. I have run the gamut from being able to put aside my grief to get through what I needed to get through...all the way to waking up in tears and not being able to stop. Like the sharp turns and drops on a roller coaster, I can’t anticipate the triggers so I just hang on and do the best I can. I know grief is a process that can’t be rushed and is different for everyone.
I so hope that we truly are reunited with all whom we loved in this life when we pass. If so, you are having the very best time now! The time will eventually come when you can greet all of us again one by one. I will look for you.
Love always,
Jo
My condolences go out to all of the Paveys. I'm sure I speak on behalf of everyone who knew Joan when I see I7m really going to miss her. I haven't seen her for quite a long time since I lived on the west coast and her in the east. However, I clearly remember all the fun times and laughter we shared; that big, big heart of hers. She cared so much for people, and yes, dogs, too. She was simply a remarkable person. Though her passing away is a sad thing, I find confort in knowing that she is bound for a better place - HEAVEN.
May you rest in peace,
Her grandson, Andrew Pavey
Our deepest sympathy to the Pavey family on the loss of such a wonderful woman.
Joan was like a combination Big Sister/Mother/Best Friend to all who had the priviledge of knowing her. She was most generous in sharing her knowledge with anyone for the betterment of the breed......she sure loved her dogs. Fortunately for us, she also passed on that generosity of spirit to Jo Ann & Terry , who were so supportive of us.............the legacy lives on.
Joan had an awesome sense of humour too, and wasn't shy to laugh at herself as well, it was a very endearing quality.
Dear Joan, you will be sorely missed, but we are sure that you'll be meeting up with some of your great friends, both 2 legged and 4 legged and there will be one awesome party!
Sincerely,
Jack and Sue
My sincerest condolences to you both and all the Pavey family on the loss of your mother and friend, Joan. It is so difficult and sad to lose a parent. Joan was a wonderful lady, gracious, kind and practical with a great sense of humour. This is also a great loss for the dog fancy as she was always willing to mentor, and provide guidance to those interested in the fancy. I feel very privileged to have met her and had the opportunity to talk with her on more than one occasion. It was the gorgeous blue Whitegates Shelties that introduced me to my favorite colour in the breed.
With my deepest sympathies,
Maureen
Mom, it has now been over a month since your passing and I have had ample time to reflect on our relationship and how you influenced me during my life. My fondest recollections of you go way back to when we (the three youngest of your 4)would come home from school to the cheery greetings from you and the constant encouragement to get our homework done to have more time to go to the cow fields to play football or baseball. Then would come the many family dinners when you would act as referee amongst us all, which of course led to many stimulating discussions, whether it be on politics, sports, or just life in general. I always appreciated your encouragement when I would approach you or Dad with one of my hairbrained schemes. Regardless, whatever we did you were there for us.
I can still remember the look of pride on your face whenever one of us accomplished some sort of feat, as well as the look of disappointment when we messed up. Regardless, the support was always there.
I can to this date, remember you taking me under your wing to teach me all the ins and outs of the dog world, from handling to cleaning out the kennels. I also remember the ease in which you were able to expand that knowledge to your youngest and the success that Whitegates Kennels had over the years with your guidance and mentoring.
When you came to live with us, I was proud of the determination and guts you showed in getting on with your life despite your setback and trying new things. It was unfortunate that this time of your life did not work out for you and that you decided to go back to Toronto as it became more and more difficult to see you and talk about memories.
It is only now that I realize how much our family misses you. We still talk of how you were able to go from just hanging around the house to life of the party whenever we had people over for dinner and the condolences from our friends continue to come in on a day to day basis.
Next month we will officially send you back to Dad, after 41 years. Although you are already there, this will only make it final closure for all of us, although there will be a marker for you and Dad so that all who venture in that area of Mount Royal will know who has gone before us. Being reunited with Dad after all these years means you can finally carry on the love affair you two had all the while watching over us all.
I will really miss you Mom and I will always love you dearly.
Gordon
Joan, it's been a year ago today and I still think about you almost every day. Today was actually a good day, and there haven't been many of them this past year. I felt you around me just like I did a year ago when you passed. I'll always miss you. Until we meet again.
Jo
Happy Birthday Joan. I miss you every day, but think of you often on your birthday.
Jo
I only met your Mom once. It was the day we added a most treasured member to our family, thanks to her. That was around 1986. I have never forgotten her, and was in contact with her about our "Ginger" several times over the years. Our Sheltie gave our family a lot of love for many years. She was so smart, and had the best personality of any dog I've ever met. I'll always be grateful to Joan for her.
Post a Comment